First Step… Now what
(omg, I’m having deja vu of writing about having deja vu of this post… yeah brain hurts)
So I visited some friends that I haven’t seen in a while this past weekend. Strangely enough I spent a good deal of time during the party talking to the “new” people. People we play WoW with but had never met in real life before then. During this trip it became clear that this past weekend may be the last time that whole lot of people get together. Strictly for location reasons nothing morbidly serious for that group.
Anywho, it was that realization that gave birth to another realization. They’re the last group of friends that I hang out with somewhat regularly.
All my other friends, still see each other but it’s done in more of a spontaneous nature not in the “I know I will see them again” like it was with this group.
So between this sad set of realizations, my third smoke of the day and pleasant sunday afternoon I decided it was time. Time to stop making excuses and finally start making moves on something I wanted. A relationship.
(Though I have to admit, part of this motivation was sparked by one of my friends new girlfriend. Awesome little woman).
So I go to the same online hangout I’ve been to a hundred times before, and a hundred times been disappointed. This time I was pleasantly surprised by what I saw. So I made a move. And surprisingly I got a favorable response.
Now what?
I have no clue what to talk about. I don’t talk, I listen, and respond. I interject when it’s appropriate. But now I’m in the driver seat and I haven’t a fraking clue where I’m supposed to drive to. Oh I know where I would like to end up, but it’s not somewhere that has a specific destination. If that makes any sense.
Many times before when I was in the driver seat, I ended up driving into brick walls, or the dreaded part of town called the Friend zone. Oh what a nasty place that is.
But now I need to keep my bearings, and drive true… if only I knew how to drive.
Sheesh.